Prayer is an act of humbleness toward God. It is in essence saying, “I can’t, but You can”. Prayer is a weakness in my life and has been for many years. I guess I was raised by parents who loved God, and taught self-reliance. Dad and Mom worked hard at their professions of teacher, mail carrier and do-it-yourself mastery. I learned so much from them and meditate often on what they gave to my life. They worked for everything they got in life and taught me to do the same.
What was missing over the years was my limitations in life that came through various experiences I had. It has been in those set-backs of life that have caused me to see my inadequacies and weaknesses and sinfulness. Not that I didn’t have some of those thoughts over the years, but it has become more and more clear to me over the last few years of life. I truly am a sinful person with thoughts and actions that are not pleasing to the Master. As I read the Old Testament, I am more and more drawn to the passages where God is venting his anger toward those who are screwing up. I guess that as I am trying to get closer to my Lord and Savior, I am seeing more and more of my foibles, my limitations, my weaknesses, my mistakes, my inabilities.
It’s because of these thoughts that I am drawn to Solomon in this passage in II Chronicles 2 when he said, “When they sin against you—for there is no one who does not sin—and you become angry with them and give them over to the enemy, who takes them captive to a land far away or near; and if they have a change of heart in the land where they are held captive, and repent and plead with you in the land of their captivity and say, ‘We have sinned, we have done wrong and acted wickedly’; and if they turn back to you with all their heart and soul in the land of their captivity where they were taken, and pray toward the land you gave their ancestors, toward the city you have chosen and toward the temple I have built for your Name; (2 Chronicles 6:36-39 NIV) “We have sinned!!!” “We have done wrong!!!!” (We have) acted wickedly!!!!” I am more broken when I replace the “we” with “I”.
It’s in our brokenness that forgiveness comes. It’s in our mindset of not being able to give direction to our lives that God comes to us and begins to direct our lives. It’s a journey of BROKENNESS that God brings forgiveness and direction for the future.