Passion: Understanding the Problem

Posted on June 20, 2017 by James Gorton

Before you can tackle any problem, you have to know the depth and the breadth of the problem.  You have to know what you are dealing with.  Have you ever tried to fix something and realized as you got into fixing it that you quickly were over your head with other problems?

I remember being at my moms house and saw that a drain pipe in the bathroom sink was leaking.  I had fixed sink drains many times before so I thought no big deal.  I can fix it.  What I didn’t realize at the time is that when I began to get into the project the pipes were corroded and very thin.  I mean very thin.  You get the picture.  As I put a wrench on the pipe to loosen it things began to break.  I realized rather quickly that I was in over my head.  I needed a professional plumber’s help.  I hadn’t adequately surveyed the problem before I began the project.

When Nehemiah grabbed ahold of his passion to help his people be build their city, he needed to survey the problem so that he could adequately convey the passion and how to fix the problem.  “I set out during the night with a few others. I had not told anyone what my God had put in my heart to do for Jerusalem. There were no mounts with me except the one I was riding on. By night I went out through the Valley Gate toward the Jackal Well and the Dung Gate, examining the walls of Jerusalem, which had been broken down, and its gates, which had been destroyed by fire. Then I moved on toward the Fountain Gate and the King’s Pool, but there was not enough room for my mount to get through; so I went up the valley by night, examining the wall. Finally, I turned back and reentered through the Valley Gate. The officials did not know where I had gone or what I was doing, because as yet I had said nothing to the Jews or the priests or nobles or officials or any others who would be doing the work.”  Nehemiah‬ ‭2:12-16‬ ‭NIV‬‬

Nehemiah, as he surveyed the problem, realized the enormity of the task so that he could invest his passion in the lives of others.  On this journey make sure that the passion you have is followed by some time to see the problems associated with your passion.  Understanding what needs to be done will help you succeed in your passion.

 

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Passion With A Plan

Posted on June 19, 2017 by James Gorton

Passion is an essential ingredient for impacting our world.  It does alter our emotions as we stay focused on the issue that grabs our hearts.  There’s one problem that erodes the passion of our hearts.

It’s passion without a plan.  Let me explain.  How many of you have set up New Year’s resolutions over the course of your life?  I am afraid to look back on all the decades of my life and the resolutions I wanted to implement in my life at the start of the new year. I would have all the best intentions to hold the line in meeting my resolution, but my resolution would invariably begin to crumble over the weeks because of a lack of a plan.

Someone once said, “A goal without a plan without an action equals a dream.  A goal with a plan with action equals reality.  We can be the most passionate person about reaching the goal, but if we don’t have a plan or take action on that goal, we will only experience a dream and regret our not fulfilling the passion that comes our way.  I have a passion for helping marriages and families, but I needed the education and training that would provide me an opportunity to counsel couples and parents who were seeking to resolve the issues that created disconnection in their relationships.  It took many years (almost 25+ years after graduating from high school), but at 45 I had finished my last doctorate and opened the door to creating a private practice of marital and parental therapy.

Nehemiah was a man who had passion for his people who were enslaved and had experienced hopelessness in trying to become free.  Not only did he have passion for saving his people, but he had a plan when the opportunity was given him to help his people.  “The king said to me, “What is it you want?” Then I prayed to the God of heaven, and I answered the king, “If it pleases the king and if your servant has found favor in his sight, let him send me to the city in Judah where my ancestors are buried so that I can rebuild it.” Then the king, with the queen sitting beside him, asked me, “How long will your journey take, and when will you get back?” It pleased the king to send me; so I set a time. I also said to him, “If it pleases the king, may I have letters to the governors of Trans-Euphrates, so that they will provide me safe-conduct until I arrive in Judah? And may I have a letter to Asaph, keeper of the royal park, so he will give me timber to make beams for the gates of the citadel by the temple and for the city wall and for the residence I will occupy?” And because the gracious hand of my God was on me, the king granted my requests.”  Nehemiah‬ ‭2:4-8 NIV

Nehemiah knew how long the mission would take, but also had calculated the material that would be needed to rebuild Jerusalem.  He knew that he needed security guards that would get him to his destination safely.  He had a plan.

On this journey, passion will come into our lives as we feel emotion for those less fortunate.  Make sure that passion is not the only focus of your eye gaze, but that you plan for how your desire will be realized.

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Passion That Alters

Posted on June 18, 2017 by James Gorton

I have never been able to play poker and win.  I don’t have a poker face when I play and all the players around the table know whether I have a good hand or not just by looking at me.  I have tried to keep a straight face, but people find me out.  My face gives my cards away.

I have another problem.  I can’t put on a happy face when there are things going on in my life or issues with my family that haven’t been resolved.  Unresolved problems negatively affect me and until they are resolved, my facial mannerisms carry the tale-tell signs of the struggle wherever I go.  My wife knows when there is something bothering me.  I can’t get away with anything.  My daughters and son know me so well that they confront me when something is affecting me.  I have never been able to lie and get away with it because unresolved issues alter the external parts of my body and those around me always know.  My passion for connected relationships are altered when those connected relationships are disconnected.

I have been reading the book of Nehemiah in the Old Testament and realized that Nehemiah had the same problem.  In my previous jlog, I wrote about his passion for his Jewish people who had been ravaged by war and were in disarray.  He wept and mourned and prayed for months because of his compassion for his brothers and sisters.  As you read on, you find out that Nehemiah’s job was to test the wine to see if it was fit for the King.  If the wine was poisoned, he would die and the king would live.  Every day he was to test the wine before the King would drink it.  After a few months of hearing about his people, the passion he had for them altered his external appearance.  “In the month of Nisan in the twentieth year of King Artaxerxes, when wine was brought for him, I took the wine and gave it to the king. I had not been sad in his presence before, so the king asked me, “Why does your face look so sad when you are not ill? This can be nothing but sadness of heart.” I was very much afraid, but I said to the king, “May the king live forever! Why should my face not look sad when the city where my ancestors are buried lies in ruins, and its gates have been destroyed by fire?”  ‭‭Nehemiah‬ ‭2:1-3‬ ‭NIV‬‬

Our passion here on this earth will affect our effect.  What we find as most important to us in this world will alter our emotions and cause us to focus on that passion.  Not everyone will become passionate about what we are passionate about.  Not everyone will be impassioned to save a certain group of people.  Not everyone will be passionate for giving communicative tools to marriages and families.  Not everyone will take every waking minute to feed the homeless.

On this journey, God has a specific purpose for each of us and will give us a passion for that niche if we are available to hear His call.  Be careful.  It will alter how you view life.

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What Is Your Passion?

Posted on June 8, 2017 by James Gorton

Early in my adult life, I was sent to Tampa, Florida to work with college students at the University of South Florida.  While there I attended Christ Community Church.  I began to notice a lot of young couples in the church who had no organized time to gather nor was there any pastor to give them guidance on their marital journey.  As I talked with some of them they were floundering in their desire to have a better marriage and didn’t have anywhere to go to get answers to their issues.

It was after talking to them that I began to have a burning desire to help them.  I went to the head pastor and asked if I could start a young couples group to talk about some of these issues.  He said to me that it would be okay but there was no space available to do so.  I saw a huge shade tree outside his window and asked if we could meet under it and he had no problem with the idea.  The next week we advertised the group starting and when the day came for the first meeting over 20 couples showed up.

That Sunday school class fueled my passion for working with married couples.  After pursuing 4 post-graduate degrees and spending countless hours of counseling couples and families over the years, my passion has not been abated.  The more counseling I do the more I love it.  It reminds me of a passion another person had in the bible as I was reading today.  It’s the story of Nehemiah after he heard about his people and their fate.  “The words of Nehemiah son of Hakaliah: In the month of Kislev in the twentieth year, while I was in the citadel of Susa, Hanani, one of my brothers, came from Judah with some other men, and I questioned them about the Jewish remnant that had survived the exile, and also about Jerusalem. They said to me, “Those who survived the exile and are back in the province are in great trouble and disgrace. The wall of Jerusalem is broken down, and its gates have been burned with fire.” When I heard these things, I sat down and wept. For some days I mourned and fasted and prayed before the God of heaven.”
‭‭Nehemiah‬ ‭1:1-4‬ ‭NIV‬‬

When Nehemiah heard about his brothers and sisters in distress, he fasted and mourned and wept and prayed for days.  Nehemiah began to experience passion when he heard about a disaster that occurred with people he loved.  His whole life was taken up with the seeking to fix the disaster he heard about.

What drives your passion?  What keeps you up at night or wakes you up early in the morning?  What thoughts do you have that you can’t seem to shake?  I believe that God put Nehemiah here on this earth to build the wall of Jerusalem.  I know He put me here on this earth to work with marriages and families.  What is your passion He has or is calling you to do?

On this journey I believe that we all have a purpose and we all have certain gifts and abilities He wants us to use.  Take some time on your journey to find your passion.  Keeping your eyes open to hurts and problems in life is the first step in the process.

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Impartial Judges

Posted on June 4, 2017 by James Gorton

I have a problem with the way judges come up with their decisions today.  Mind you my experience is very limited and has been skewed by my being an expert witness in court only a few times in child custody cases.  As a result of those decisions I determined I would never go into a courtroom as an expert witness again.  Let me give you one example.

A 12-year-old child was being physically abused by the father and step mom.  He would come home to his mother with black and blue bruises that were documented by a physician to take to court.  The father was driving a new Mercedes and was a building contractor, but only reported $6000 of income each year.  The child didn’t want to go back to the abusive father and wanted to stay permanently with the mother and her husband. The ruling by the judge was that full custody was given to the father and the mother had to pay child support to him.  You tell me the justice in that.

I tell you this example because I came across a passage that I would love to have every judge in the country read.  Jehoshaphat, King of Judah, talked to all the judges he hired and told them the following.  “He appointed judges in the land, in each of the fortified cities of Judah. He told them, “Consider carefully what you do, because you are not judging for mere mortals but for the LORD, who is with you whenever you give a verdict. Now let the fear of the LORD be on you. Judge carefully, for with the LORD our God there is no injustice or partiality or bribery.” II Chronicles 19:5-7 NIV

Wouldn’t it be nice if all judges were told this truth and had the fear of God put in them!  Did you get the phrase, “With the LORD our God, there is no injustice or partiality or bribery.”  Wouldn’t it be nice if we could depend upon the court system to hand out judgments that way.  You can be assured that in the end, crooked judges will have consequences for the way they have judged.  For that matter, so will we.

We can be assured that on this journey, the God of the universe will make all things right, even if we have experienced judgments that are partial and filled with bribery.  Gods’ judgments will ultimately prevail.

 

 

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Going With The Crowd

Posted on June 3, 2017 by James Gorton

All of us have experienced peer pressure at some point in our lives.  We want to fit in and be a part of the group so we go along to get along.  Now even as I write this I know that some of you and maybe many of you are strong-willed and balk at me saying we’ve all done it.  If you haven’t ever given into peer pressure good for you.  But for the rest of us it’s hard at times in our lives when everyone else is doing something to stand by our principles.  It becomes easier when we become an adult to stand alone, but in the teen years it’s difficult because the peers are so important.

In grade school it may be a popular group we want to be in so we do what the group does to be accepted.  In the junior high and high school years, it may involve trying alcohol or drugs or smoking a cigarette or marijuana.   As an adult, when everyone is speeding over the limit and passing you by, do you hold to the speed limit and move over to the slow lane?  It takes will power to hold to our principles when it seems that everyone is going in the opposite direction.

I was reading in the bible about an individual who was pressured to go with the crowd.  His name was Micaiah and he was a prophet.  The backdrop of the story had the King of Israel wanting the king of Judah to go to battle with him.  The king of Judah wanted to seek the Lord before going to battle to see what He wanted.  “So the king of Israel brought together the prophets—four hundred men—and asked them, “Shall we go to war against Ramoth Gilead, or shall I not?” “Go,” they answered, “for God will give it into the king’s hand.”  II Chronicles 18:5

The response of the 400 prophets of Israel didn’t satisfy the king of Judah so he wanted one who would prophesy in the name of the Lord.  There was only one prophet in the country who did that and his name was Micaiah.  They sent for him and this is what they said to him.  All the other prophets were prophesying the same thing. “Attack Ramoth Gilead and be victorious,” they said, “for the LORD will give it into the king’s hand.” The messenger who had gone to summon Micaiah said to him, “Look, the other prophets without exception are predicting success for the king. Let your word agree with theirs, and speak favorably.” 2 Chronicles‬ ‭18: 11-12‬ ‭NIV‬‬

As you read the rest of the story, Micaiah initially did what the other 400 prophets wanted him to do–say the same thing they had said.  But when the king of Judah challenged him to speak in the name of the Lord, he spoke from the Lord and told them that if they went they would be defeated.

Speaking up and saying the right thing knowing you are going against the crowd is difficult because you will stand alone when you do it.  Do you want to be known for being in the crowd or doing and saying the right thing even if you have to go it alone.

On this journey, there will be times when you are called to be the lone voice speaking the truth to others.  It will be at times seem lonely, but know that God will never leave nor forsake those who follow Him fully.

 

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Bald Eagle?

Posted on June 1, 2017 by James Gorton

Have you ever believed something and then found out your belief was false?  I had one of those days a few weeks ago.  Nadine and I ventured up to Flagstaff for the weekend and did our 4+ mile walk through the forest trees, smelling the fresh pine smells and blue sky.  Did I tell you it was Flagstaff where the temperature is 25-30 degrees cooler?  Anyway on this walk I spied a large bird in the trees that I swore was a bald eagle.  It had a white head and black body.  Here is what I saw.

DSC_0168

As we approached to get a closer look, be began to notice something different about this large bird.  It did have a white head and a black body, but we also noticed a black strip on its eyes and a white underbelly.  What we saw from a distance in our mind was changed as we walked closer and closer.  Although  we wanted it to be a bald eagle, we realized that it wasn’t what our minds told us, but was an osprey.

Don’t get me wrong.  It was a wonderful sight to see such a magnificent bird and the way it flew in the air, but our minds were anticipating the validation of what we wanted it to be.  It was a  let down to realize that the bald eagle turned out to be an osprey.

This kind of thing happens in life all the time.  We are taking a test and are sure we know the answers to the questions only to realize that our answers weren’t the ones the teacher was looking for.  We are in a relationship and think that we have a bald eagle kind of picture, and the person we are with turns out to be different from what we anticipated.  We may have studied long and hard for a job of our dreams and when we get closer to realizing our potential, the real thing turns out to be different that our fantasy.  If we hold on to our initial impressions, we are doomed to disappointment rather than changing our mindset of what we see presently and appreciating what we do see and do have.

On this journey there will be times when life and relationships take a right or left turn and we weren’t expecting the turn.  Embrace the here and now and appreciate what you have.

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A Choice To Listen

Posted on May 31, 2017 by James Gorton

Early on in my life, I read a passage that became my life verse.  It is found in II Chronicles 16:9 where God comes to King Asa, king of Judah.  He tells him through a seer, or prophet the following.  “For the eyes of the Lord move throughout the earth that He might strongly support those whose heart is completely his.” NAS.  This passage hit me hard when I read it, because the seer was saying to King Asa that the Lord is continually looking all over the earth to find individuals whose heart is 100% devoted and committed to following after the teachings and direction of the Lord.

I took on this verse as a verse that I wanted to pursue with all of my heart.  I had this verse caligraphied and put into a frame that is hanging on my office wall as I write this jlog.  I have read it numerous times over the years, memorized it and given it to others as a word of encouragement in their journey with the Lord.  This year is no exception as I was again reading through the scriptures and came upon this verse.  This time as I read it something new popped up in my mind.  Here is the passage with a couple of verses before and after it.

“At that time Hanani the seer came to Asa king of Judah and said to him:  “Because you relied on the king of Aram and not on the LORD your God, the army of the king of Aram has escaped from your hand.  Were not the Cushites and Libyans a mighty army with great numbers of chariots and horsemen?  Yet when you relied on the LORD, he delivered them into your hand.  For the eyes of the LORD range throughout the earth to strengthen those whose hearts are fully committed to him.  You have done a foolish thing, and from now on you will be at war.”  Asa was angry with the seer because of this; he was so enraged that he put him in prison.  At the same time Asa brutally oppressed some of the people.”  II Chronicles 16:  7-10 NIV

God is taking King Asa back over history and telling him about the times when Asa rested upon the Lord and how the Lord gave him victory over the Cushites and Libyans.  He also tells King Asa that in this present situation, King Asa didn’t rely upon the Lord.  Asa blew it.  Asa rested upon himself and not the Lord.  Asa made a mistake.  Why was the Lord bringing this bad decision to King Asa?  Was it to bring him down?  Was it to make him feel like a loser?  Was it to give him the message that he was a failure?  None of these thoughts came to my mind when I read this passage.

God wanted Asa to admit his mistake of trusting others versus trusting God.  God wanted Asa to humble himself and admit his sin.  Unfortunately that’s not what God got.  Instead, Asa was angry for having the seer point out the truth and put the seer in prison.  He took out his anger on the messenger, rather than humbling himself and admitting his wrong.  Asa took it further by brutally oppressing other people who had nothing to do with his decisions.  When we are convicted of sin in our lives and don’t take responsibility for our wrong actions, we like Asa take out our anger and frustration on those who are closest to us.

On this journey there will be times when we make mistakes and God through others or by His spirit will bring conviction.  He is looking for a humble and remorseful response so that He can continually support us and give us direction for the future.  Be careful how you respond to wrong roads taken.

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Conditions For Godly Connections

Posted on May 24, 2017 by James Gorton

There was a poll taken in the United States and people were asked if they believed in God.  Nine of ten people surveyed said they believed in God.  Of the nine who believe in God, most if not all would say that they want to have connection with the God of the universe to get His perspective on their lives.  Most if not all would want to have God give them answers to their prayers and help solve the dilemmas that they find themselves in.  All of us whether or not we believe in God find ourselves in relationships at times where we see no hope nor answers in solving the stalemates that seem to come.

If only we had a step by step plan for connecting with the God who is able to give us insight and wisdom for life’s challenges.  Well, as I was reading the bible today, I came across just such a plan and it was written by God through the writer of II Chronicles.  He says, “if my people, who are called by my name, will humble themselves and pray and seek my face and turn from their wicked ways, then I will hear from heaven, and I will forgive their sin and will heal their land.”  ‭‭2 Chronicles‬ ‭7:14‬ ‭NIV‬‬

This passage starts with a conditional “If.”  God is willing to connect with us and give us direction, but we have a responsibility in the connection.  In fact there are five important responsibilities that God spells out as to our actions.  The first responsibility is to be apart of His family and be called by His name.  Jesus speaks more clearly to this step when He talks to Nicodemus in John 3 where He tells us to become one of His children by recognizing what He did on the cross and receiving Christ into our lives.  That’s what being called by His name means.

The second step in this process of connecting with God is to humble ourselves.  The humbling process is admitting our faults and recognizing our inability to solve our problems on our own.  Humbling is admitting we can’t but He can.  The humbling process moves us to step number three where we pray and ask the God of the universe to intervene on our behalf.  Praying to God causes us to take our eyes off our self and begin to focus on the face of Christ (step 4).

When we begin to focus on God and humble ourselves, it will reveal the unhealthy choices we have made and negative attitudes we have manifest in our interaction with others.  Seeing Him and His purity shines a light on all the wrong choices and behaviors we have had which opens us to wanting to turn from the bad and seek the good.

It’s the 5 steps that we take which causes God to then act in our behalf.  When we are serious about humbling, praying, seeking, and turning, He says He hears from heaven, forgive us of our sins, and heals our land.  I know, it would be easier if we didn’t have to do anything, but that’s not God’s plan.  He wants to be in relationship with us which means that we both participate in the connection.

On this journey, connection with God is possible if only we are willing to do our part in preparing our heart and mind to interact with Him.  It only takes 5 steps.

 

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Seeing Up Close

Posted on May 23, 2017 by James Gorton

On our trip to New Mexico, we passed the National Petrified Forest Park in eastern Arizona.  As we were walking on one of the trails, I came across a lizard I had never seen before.  It is called a common ring neck lizard that I thought you might like to see.  At first glance you see the beauty of this lizard with its colorful markings.

DSC_0172

I am colorblind, but I could see the beautiful markings of this common ring neck reptile.  You can see the black rings on the neck, the yellow feet, the gray and yellow dots on his body and tail, and the solid gray (I was informed by my wife as she read my jlog that my description of the colors is way off) on his legs.  I looked at his color and even my color blindness appreciated the beauty he bestowed lying on this rock.

What I did next was to enhance this picture a bit and bring it closer.

fullsizeoutput_3264

You begin to see something different about this lizard.  He is covered with little dots like armor all over his body.  His nose has bright red dots (what color I see) and his eyes have those same dots to protect him when he is going among the thorns of the desert.  You also see the ears to the left of his eyes just before the black, white and yellow rings around his neck.  Such a little reptile and yet she is one of 9,500+ reptiles slithering on the surface of the earth.  A magnificent species of God’s creation.

As I have gone on this journey, I have never stopped to meditate on one aspect of God’s creation as I am learning to do.  My getting from point A to point B  and accomplishing my goals in life have often hindered my eyes from seeing the beauty right in front of me. This lizard has taught me to slow down and really see the beauty that is before me, including those He has placed before me in relationship with.  Today is another opportunity to see His beauty.

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